In my last blog post, Fear of Dying, Fear of Living, I explained how we cling to our belief system. Freud and Kierkegaard deciphered how our mind mimics everything in culture to define the Self and pursue happiness. They also understood that beyond the mind, we feel expansive and extraordinary. We all know what they mean by that; we all feel precious and unique.
If, in my twenties, someone had told me that I would end up talking about this, I would have laughed like a disrespectful hyena. But it is what it is, so I'll say it: Spirituality is about getting closer to our unique preciousness. I discovered this while exploring my Home Within, and since then, I decided to live by different rules. I'm honouring my uniqueness over my mind-ego (built upon our tendencies to imitate culture).
Making an impact with our own rules
If we are on this quest to make this world sustainable and fairer, we can actively participate in cultural change. Still, perhaps the most immediate and empowering solution is transforming ourselves. These are two reasons:
Culture is anchored in our belief system, and we overlook its toxic nuances imprinted in our own behaviour. Will it be possible to change the world with our ingrained toxicity?
We live in our minds, over-stimulated and harassed by culture. The reality we created harms us; we will work more effectively if we find a healthy balance.
When we connect with our true precious Self (hopefully, you will agree with me that deep down, we are wise and love-guided), different rules emerge. I'm not talking about disrupting the life we have; I'm talking about using our compass to make purposefully guided decisions. What could be more extraordinary and life-fulfilling than exploring our inherent wisdom?
Little words that I love :)
I heard Jeffrey Allen speak about Spiritual fitness and loved the term. It sounds cool to think we can practice mind, body, heart and soul fitness. I get in shape in my Home Within. Yet, I shifted my mindset to avoid a garbage-in-garbage-out solution and get in shape successfully.
The following are three essential shifts that helped me find a greater dimension of my SELF.
#1 We are not our minds!
The words heart, body, mind, and soul together already sound like a cliche. However, I found that although we work on them, we don't fully synchronise them to work together. Instead, we treat them as independent areas to work on. Let me explain how so:
Mind
“We think therefore we exist," said Descartes. We are our minds. We prioritise rational thinking over everything else. We've lived in awe of our minds for centuries, and we admire the progress of societies and individuals based on and because of their mental capabilities. The mind overrules the entire human resource.
The subcategories
Body, Heart and Soul
Body. Little is said about how our bodies impact our experiences and mental states every single moment. Only recently, we are discovering the wisdom of the body.
Soul. Spirituality is a word with various connotations, but we miss how it defines and shapes us. We miss a lot of practical and comprehensive vocabulary.
Heart. We suppress emotions. When it gets hard, we can either surf the waves of self-help or visit psychologists; they'll help us cope.
Our system, our Home Within, is about integrating the SELF into a cohesive experiential being. Sometimes my body talks; sometimes, it's the heart; and sometimes, it's the soul. In my Home Within, the mind no longer overrules and ignores them. We can learn to listen, for they all speak in interesting and meaningful ways. That's the base for learning how to deal with life experiences for well-being and growth.
I regulated the dominating and unhealthy habits of my mind; I paid attention and learned to use my body, heart and soul to stabilise it. Home Within is an invitation to explore intuitively and beyond knowledge when each aspect inside of us says something. I will explain more as I post (there is too much information, and I'm adhering to a 4-5 minute read).
Practising fitness in my Home Within made me adaptable and expansive. I observed actively and practised getting out of my brain to change how I experience living. How so?
#2 We are NOT our Beliefs; that's borrowed stuff.
The challenge in our Home Within consists of deconstructing our belief system, shaped by culture. In my Dopamine Post, I mentioned how culture is going faster than our biology; some may have better-coping mechanisms, but we will all face generalised SELF imbalance. We can re-humanise ourselves. Get fit. We can shape ourselves to be less of an image of culture and assimilate less of its energy.
When one gets out of the mind, one starts noticing addictive thinking behaviours, toxic thought patterns, mental obsessions, superfluous validations, and the silly little lies that keep us chained to our beliefs. But to work on mental fitness, aside from meditating, one needs to: Get The Armour Off.
#3 Get the armour off.
I first heard the word Compassion at a silent retreat in 2017. I immediately planned to skip the Love and Kindness Sessions when I heard about them. An hour of mushy talk? Thanks, but no thanks (follow with a hyena laugh).
But silent retreats are purposefully very boring, so seeking engagement is instinctive. As I sat there listening to the talk, it occurred to me that I was so uninterested in compassion as I was uninterested in treating myself kindly (I wasn't aware that I had a relationship with myself. I was only my mind).
In the wellness metaverse, one oftentimes hears the word, Inner child. I still don't know the specifics of it, but I sometimes feel like when I was four years old, and my mom dropped me off late at daycare. She expected me to leave the car and valiantly walk myself in. She left as I crossed the gates and missed that I remained paralysed behind a tree in the front yard. Eventually, someone noticed me after who knows how long, grabbed my hand, and called my mom, asking to pick me up because I was all peed and cold.
I may be 45 now but still live with that fearful child. Finding well-being is about mindful compassion with our raw and childish emotions. We can heal our inner child, but this will only happen if we show up for ourselves with generosity, patience, and kindness. The empathy that we miss in the world is the empathy that we miss first and foremost while talking to ourselves.
Home Within is about practising emotional, mental, body, and spiritual fitness, guided by self-love. When I took my armour off, I was ready to observe and walk in the maze of my mind.
Wrap up!
Home Within is a rich environment where we can work on our well-being and expansion. Metabolising experiences in healthy ways means sometimes we are our body, sometimes we are emotions, and sometimes we are connecting with our soul to guide us in the life we are meant to live.
Home Within is not a goal-oriented plan but a mindset-flow life plan. If you want to learn more, you can register here.
Have a great week!
Adriana